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Laetus in Praesens

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About Me:: I write...
I write for love
The one to be found within oneself
I write quickly!
I write to capture that moving demon
Within my body
I write
To trap it into my lines
Grab it with my hungry claws
And let it rest there for eternity,
Let it rest and remind me
As a living memory
Of how life is
How it is meant to be.

I keep that daemon locked
Captured in the past
Living in the present
To remind
To bite me with its bloody teeth,
Harm my flesh
To feast of my being, now and always

Then sometimes, I let it be
When I go back to reading my own poetry
That’s what a memory is meant to represent
A living demon captured in a page
A better stage
Than my soul, my body

Am I a poet?
I don’t know, isn’t everyone
That has ever tried to find light
In creating lines?

I am me
I look back to the mirror
And all I see is glowing eyes
A fire
A clenched jaw and eyebrows falling sharp
Creating the hard lines on a forehead
On which a vein is pulsing hard
Anger and passion, is it not?
Maybe they signify
The battle for this life
Where in my misery I try
To compete with this beast
Standing against me
A beast
That no one has ever managed to defeat
A beast
That shows its brutality
Through the flames which melt the wax
Dripping it on the soft wings of a butterfly
That used to fly freely, carelessly
Its brutality that feels
Like salt on an open wound
That takes the life from
A little child
That never got the chance
To make the first step on its own little feet
Without anybody’s help
This beast called destiny

Yes, cruelty its middle name
And it is what I recognize
When I try to find rest
In this imaginary nest
Which I so skillfully try to construct
By bending my body until it breaks
And leaves the feeling of defeat
Within me
That is why there’s this need to write
To speak
To remind my mind of it!
That is how I manage to get by
And learn that there’s no life
If even for a moment I try
To lie to myself

And, although I sometimes try to hide
Pretend, or even descend
A level from the truth
I write
And extend a hand to myself
I find, the love I can never get
And in that one instance
I feel no regret
For being here
Being present and alive!

Website:: http://q-poetry.ning.com/

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Alex Q Poetry's Blog

The Countdown

Where are we now?
Where do we stand?
I can’t pretend that I know
How you really feel about me
Or which way
I’d like to be led by your trembling hands
But I recognize the intent
Of being tied in each other’s destiny
I hear the heavy sigh of regret
You wish you weren’t so afraid
When we were approaching
The gates of reality
I know it is me today
Bending in front of the ruling hand of fear
I feel you nearing me
And I wonder how the new collision will feel
I keep my eyes shut
But I’m still able to h… Continue

Posted on March 28, 2009 at 11:55pm —

Paint Me Beautiful

Color me pretty
Paint me beautiful
With crayons or, water paints
If you truly love me,
Just because you love me

Show me that picture of my self
Let me recognize each line of my portrait
The way your deep gray eyes see it,
Then let me use my fingertips to feel it
Because these eyes
Don’t believe what they see
Only the touch reveals the true beauty

So let me touch and feel
How your heart pictures me
And copy that image
Into a smile on my face
Because these brows are weighing heavy
Like storm clo… Continue

Posted on March 28, 2009 at 11:30pm —

Heavy

Love,
I’ve been trying for days
To write this poem about you
This one poem,
Made of words like pieces of my soul
Torn from the silky thread
To be laid down on the paper.
A poem to let you know
That there’s nothing to fear now
Because, I set my course
And all the roads lead in your direction.

I’m trying to write you this one poem
But… I’m failing.
I’m beat by my selfishness,
The greediness of the child in me
That would rather keep these sweets
Just to herself.
Because see, for me
Emotion transla… Continue

Posted on March 28, 2009 at 11:30pm —

Cake

Your inquiry makes me laugh dear friend:
“Staying out of trouble?”
Yes, yes
Hold on
I don’t know
No
I’ll be honest with you
I have to say no

She likes me you know
She plays this game so well
Calls me up to tell me
How she can’t get me out of her head
And instead backing away
I give in and say:
“Really? Why?”

Trouble you see
Because I know where her words lead
I want to stop now
But I can’t
Because she’s playing with my hair
Then she gently touches my neck

I… I’d say something
But she has me c… Continue

Posted on October 26, 2008 at 9:03pm —

An Assault

Ever since pride week there has been 8 assaults on our campus, most of them are officially considered as hate crimes since yesterday on members of the queer community at WSU. This is my response to the "haters."

An Assault

I assaulted a person today
My fists punching that bag of filthy life
Crushing his boney contours
Knuckles bruising his dirty face

His once graceful self
Was kissing the dirt on the floor
Breathing in the dust
Hugging the earth
Holding to it
Like He once held his moth… Continue

Posted on October 24, 2008 at 12:00am —

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At 6:33pm on March 28, 2009, Melissa said…: hey, sorry it has taken so long for me to accept your add and get back to you. Life has been crazy! I hope you are doing well. :)

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At 2:52am on October 14, 2008, ReeSee said…: Hi sweetie, sorry for the delay, I have been M.I.A, but i'm back and sending some love your way, hope all is well, ReeS!